From centuries people have been learning about relationships and experiencing all kinds of abuse in their day to day life whether personally experiencing or through knowing about others’ stories. There are many kinds of abuse-child abuse, old age abuse and female-child abuse with various types: emotional abuse, physical abuse, financial and mental abuse. People usually low in power in any aspect face such kinds of abuse. Like a land load owner will threaten his workers of hunger and tortures them; a brutal husband would threaten his wife for being not so obedient and caring due to having super control over her life given by the society and law; a rude demanding sexual person could humiliate any child of his choice due to his greedy, inhuman and frustrating emotions and animal instincts. The abuser finds pleasure in his abuse as he wants to control his victim as per his wish and desire. There is no way to convince him or her that they are being wrong with their victims and they are not going to listen to you in normal circumstances.
When I talk about female child abuse in Pakistan, people give me a shut-up call that all of this is shit as they respect their traditions, culture and values. They firmly believe in their traditions whether they are so valuable or not. Just like the people of some regions in Africa where people fed young girls unhygienically and over load them to make them beautiful! It is just like those people who let their daughters to have sex with someone special to clean them before marriage (e.g. in some regions of Africa) and they don’t realize that it could be dangerous to their health as well. Female genital mutilation is also an example of so called cultural thing that is against the universal human rights. People do not follow the guidelines of the scientific research going on in the world; rather for most of the time, due to their vulnerability and extreme poverty they are totally helpless in finding another solution to their problems. Usually under pressurized cultures, weak gender that is women is always a target. In many societies of the world where female child abuse is very common; it is also the fact that they are extremely poor and malnourished societies of the world.
In Pakistan, people are not always so much poor to decide about their daughters; however they are still maintaining their deeply rooted traditions – I don’t know why! Girls are subject to leave their parents’ home forever after marriage and boys are thought to keep with their parents, perhaps to take care of them in the old age. Girls are not given any skill to earn their living as they are thought as husbands responsibility. They have to ask for the money from husband from time to time, day by day, monthly or whenever they feel it is the best time to ask. The husband has got an authority over them – he decides what a wife should do for him, what a wife needs, what a wife should eat, what a wife should live like and what she should not do forever! The divorce is not an easy task from both sides: society pressure and law. Moreover, they are not welcome in their parental home after divorce. So girls have to bear it all while remaining in silence. The destiny for them is that husband should be nice otherwise you are as unlucky as a person who is sentenced to death!