Thanks For Your Feedback-I Am Greatly Honored

This word is usually used in researches where we are more interested in taking feedback from our participants. Some researchers use the feedback as an integral part of their whole work and keep it as original as it could be. Then, in today’s modern world, many online businesses need their customers’ feedback to improve their products and to progress in the right direction. Rather, it has become an integral part of each business online, so much so, many businesses flourish successfully only due to a continuous positive high, and consistent feedback from customers like eBay, Amazon and many others.

To see the definition of feedback please check the link below:

http://www.businessdictionary.com/definition/feedback.html

It states that “the process in which the effect or output of an action is returned (fed-back) to modify the next action. Feedback is essential to the working and survival of all regulatory mechanisms found throughout living and non-living nature, and in man-made systems such as education system and economy. As a two-way flow, feedback is inherent to all interactions, whether human-to-human, human-to-machine or machine-to-machine.”

When we use the feedback in an educational setup we usually call it reinforcement (positive and negative) that strengthens the behavior of students and modify the behavioral constructs. For example: Good grades, medals, stars, label, honorary remarks, titles and sometimes monetary benefits such as gifts, scholarships and free memberships. All are being used as a kind of reinforcer to encourage the students to learn more in the most productive manner and continue with the learning process.

However, my focus is on our emotional life which lacks feedback seriously, and keeps us from growing in rich relationships. We ask for help, get help and say thank- nothing more. We discuss ideas and concepts with friends and colleagues, get a relevant one to apply for, get the desired results and never return to those friends to say what they have said has physically been implemented by you. We go to see someone or invite someone, meet passionately and enjoy the company a lot, say, ‘see you soon’, and never call back to say how we felt in the last few days! We usually forget about the most important part of the relationship-Feedback.

Realistically, it could be anything from a simple, ‘thanks’, ‘gesture’, ‘expression’  to a nice compliment. However, in the long lasting relationships (intimate partners, parent-child, siblings, relatives, friends), it should be more than that. Consider the following statements:

What you did to me was awesome indeed………..

  1. I found the gift a superb one that could fulfill……
  2. I tried your idea and it helped me a lot in completing……
  3. Last night your dress was too elegant and graceful to make me…
  4. I am still thinking about the way you were doing that….
  5. How did you do that? It was fantastic and unbelievable…

Conclusively, usually we say ‘thanks’ for most of the time yet forget the afterward feedback required that is an additional ‘thanks’ in the form of a nice compliment after utilizing someone’s gift, idea, or after any shared delightful charitable experience. On the contrary, when we are reminded about our mindful gifts, thoughtful ideas, concerned suggestions, great company, sweet nature, nice habits, creativity, intelligence, beauty, simplicity, trustworthiness, spontaneity, and other relevant traits; we are much pleased for such a recognition and great concern. So keep it up please!

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Improve Your Perception For A Smart Choice

We all live a busy life and find no time to make decisions with complete peace of mind. Always we are in a hurry to do something, to take some action/reaction and then regret while having no choice later on! When you go for shopping, you are fascinated by different things in shops and many times you go for a thing that look prettier to you at that particular moment. There are many things that you, do not like today with that intensity for which you have bought them a few years back. You are again in the vicious circle of looking for something new everyday and keeping your regrets alive each day!

Here is a simple tip for you to consider before going for a shopping:

a. When you are overwhelmed by a product to have an instant buy, stop for a moment. Think if it is 100/100 in your mind – means you are completely in love with it! If it is that much adorable, then it will carry only 70 points in your mind after a week or so.

b. If you think that a product (you want to buy by heart) carries 70 points out of 100 in your mind, then understand that it will only hold 50 points after a week or so.

c. If you think the product is equal to 30 by 100; then it is better to leave it as it will leave you with regret after your purchase.

Now think about emotional, intimate relationship decisions. In the same scenario, when you see someone with great features; you are passionately overwhelmed by the product (boy or girl). This is the time to analyze it with caution. You can carry out a little judgment instantly and look for its value in numbers.

a. If the person carries 100 by 100; think after 10 years of marriage, the number will be reduced to 70 or so.

b. If the person carries 70 by 100; after 10 years or so, he/she will reduce his charm by 30 percent and hold only 50 out of 100.

c. If the person is keeping 30 or so marks in your heart out of 100; then please do not go for it. Leave him/her alone.

In most of the matters, when you are in between and could not decide anything for you; it is always better to leave that particular thing for a safe decision making.

My numbers are not exact; variations are always there and depend on the persons particular needs and choices criteria. However, these numbers convey the caution that we all could apply in our day to day decision making struggles, from buying a glass of water to looking for a partner to live with forever!

Thanks

Things look beautiful in shops!  

Have you ever noticed things look more beautiful in shops than viewing them at home after having a purchase?

Have you ever found someone more attractive at a distance than sitting beside him/her and have a wee chat?

Have you ever thought about the girls you adore, would become little less attractive after getting married to you (or vice versa)?

Given the fact that things lose their attraction when we find them closer and closer day by day. By nature, we cannot focus on the same object for the whole of life. We keep on changing our priorities and shifting our attention as per our needs and requirements. This is very much aligned with our innate characteristics by birth. However, there could be some exceptions in this regard too.

Now, before going for a shopping, could you imagine you have already done it. If so, then what are your feelings? If you cannot imagine, what are your feelings after having a purchase? What are your feelings after spending some time with your favorite thing? What are your feelings after a month of purchasing your favorite thing? You must have forgotten what were your feelings when you purchased something you used to fancy. So this is a continuous loop of wishing, feeling happy, and then wishing again for something else.

What about having a date with someone you love the most? Do you feel a lack in your relationship after spending some time together? If yes, you are taking people like things with whom you will be used to. If yes, then you should be very careful in selecting them for a relationship, as you get bored easily, even with humans.

People are not, like things- they grow in terms of age, experiences, knowledge, attitudes, emotions, and the list is never ending. So we never get used to and look for another. However, it is worth considering that we need to improve our relationships for not being sick to each other. The more areas of mutual interest, we explore among our relationships, the better it is for us. Otherwise, things will start deteriorating and get stuck.

Nature has protected us from being stuck in a relationship through a cool process of parenting and upbringing the children. After becoming parents, couples share many things together – thus moving forward together while focusing on the same object (e.g. Children). With children, we grow together and never get bored!

Nowadays, marketers are exploiting our emotions very wisely in terms of upgrading the software, products and attractions. We purchase them and upgrade them- thus are less likely to get a feeling like stuck. Things keep on changing, and we are never completely used to them. Things that cannot be upgraded; usually lose their attraction very soon.

 To conclude, we need to upgrade things (traits) in us to survive in the market  through various strategies like:

  1. Learning new things/ fields
  2. Having new experiences
  3. Meeting new people
  4. Visiting new places
  5. Creating new horizons

When we stop doing upgrading, we are stuck. We are used to ourselves first and then with others. Therefore, to get a long, healthy life, it is very important to continue with the change outside and inside. It is something we all are doing unconsciously with the help of evolutionary laws; it is something we need to improve too through effort and hard work.

Save Your Time And Look For Everlasting Relationships

When you go for shopping, you come across many products of your choice and you choose something that you like obviously in terms of beauty, quality, and price. When you have no choice available, you go to the item you are in need of. When there are some choices, you do a little comparison of price, brand and quality. You pick one that fits in your criteria. The point I want to raise here is that some of us go for the quality irrespective of high price; some go for the design of the product and ignore the other features; some go for the price and ignore other traits ; and we all adopt different criteria for different products in different timings. Our ultimate decision is very much satisfactory or we regret that and promise for the future awareness. We learn from our bad shopping habits and try to improve our list by adopting different strategies with respect to our knowledge of various brands and their relative quality traits.

However, in human relationships, there is less time left to amend our decisions. When we take a wrong decision in relationship, we have to suffer for longer and the after facts are everlasting in many cases. Whether you are young and in a relationship or in the process of establishing a good relationship; your little decisions in the matter contribute a lot in your future level of overall happiness and satisfaction. Once you start experiencing wrong things, your energy, enthusiasm and potential start deteriorating day by day and in the end many would collapse. That unfortunately is unacceptable and worse outcome to achieve in life.

Suppose you are a product and you want others to like you for what you are- how would you convince others to do that? Simply by showing your personality traits, attitudes, habits and emotions. But what if they like your face, body, and height! These are good pretty awesome traits of your personality, but very much deceiving and critical in terms of relationship. When someone would start living with your outer self; you might be in trouble after some time. As the other person’s relationship with you is not based on sharing something together rather attracting a body for a while. Thus, there are chances that you will go for a break up very soon! This is true to you as well, if you are going for the outer beauty of the other person. Here from outer beauty I mean anything that you could see from your naked eyes: body, job, wealth, health, successes, social life, status quo or anything alike.

On the opposite side, when you go for the inner beauty, for some specific attitude, for some unique emotional quality of a person; there are ample chances to win the game. As you are going for the long lasting traits of the product; you might not get bored and look for anything else very soon. There might be something else that you do not like or that surprise you in someone when you start living with that; but the situation would not be as intense as that in the first case could go.

Therefore, if you want your partner to look inside you for a long time; you are advised to see inside others too. When you would select a humble and honest inside  as well as show your inner clear and empathetic – your partner would appreciate it. When you show outer side and look for outer beauty; you attract the same quality in your partner and in the end, both smash bluntly to break-up or to live together forcefully.

Change Your Mind-Set And Leave You Focus On!

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We all have different kinds of mind-sets, personalities, attitudes, beliefs, values, predispositions, perceptual tendencies, and habits overall. We live by our behavioural, cognitive and emotional trails in one way or the other. These traits are our identity, pride, recognition, esteem, and means to survival. We belong to them, as they belong to us. Now let me introduce you a few examples from day to day life:

When a child asks for a specific toy- he only wants that kind of toy. He would never be happy with any other toy until or unless that toy meets the same need. So for the child, the toy is not important, rather more important is the specific requirement of that toy; the quality of the toy; or the special ability of that toy.

When you go for shopping with a mind-set, you do not compromise. You try your best to find what you need. For example, you need a mobile carrying a special feature (may be powerful camera); you would never be comfortable with any other mobile set. As you need a specific thing, you do not care for other features of other mobiles. Yes, you would be happier if you get both: the required features and other enhanced features as well.

Similarly, we look for something special in our mate. That something special might be anything from a simple gesture to a variety of personality traits. When we find that particular trait in someone, we fell in love. We do not care whether he/she has something else or not. We just want that special thing- and nothing else. Though after some time, we are quite adapted to that trait and other things start to interfere. Then we realize our mistake.

This is very much true for other areas of life. When we choose a profession for a special reason in mind; we ignore other aspects of it. We join that and regret after some time as we come to know that we are compromising a lot for our love and choice. Then we realize that one thing should not be given top priority in any situation until or unless it is our complete compulsion or limitation.

The truth is that in life, one should not focus on one particular way of living. With a specific mindset, one cannot earn total satisfaction and would lack other important and beautiful gifts of nature. Indeed, there are a thousand ways of living, countless thoughts to ponder with, limitless sources to explore, and a great number of things to enjoy, learn, focus on, deal with and to rest upon. Thus, when we travel with a particular belief in mind about anything in this world; we could be blessed to that particular thing, anyhow, but the rest of, is compromised. Whereas when we look for happiness with open heart without being prejudice; we attract all pleasures of all types in the most harmonious combination to please us, secretly, in the best everlasting manner.