goals

Keeping a balance between mind and body while focusing on the goal leads to success:

Courtesy to Google images

Today was the Fun Sports Day in St Mary’s Primary School, Bathgate. My son was also participating and having fun with his friends. It was a sunny day with light wind. I was not sure what I was going to observe and learn about that specific event. I thought I would just pass time and then come back with blank mind. After all the sports level was quite basic. There could hardly be anything to learn from.

Then I started watching little kids running and trying to win enthusiastically and with great passion. I can see real fun on their faces and more fun on the parents of those kids. It was not as boring as I thought I would be.

The main thing was that they all were of the same age in one group and belonged to almost similar cultures. They were having almost similar nurturing environments, learning facilities, and parental involvement. They had no specific instructions on how to win. They all seemed fully engaged with the idea of winning and having fun. I meant to say that despite having similar developmental levels and almost equal learning opportunities, one or two of them stood apart out of the group of around 20 to 25 and won the race.

I observed that the children who won had some similar traits, for instance:

They all were very much focused

They all were maintaining a balance between their brains and body movements

They all seemed very much attentive to their tasks

They all were maintaining a normal pace neither fast nor slow

They won irrespective of their body shape and energy level as some of them were fat

I also noticed that the children who were left behind the winners were sharing some traits too, for instance

Some were fun-seeking

Some were highly enthusiastic

Some were overly anxious

Some were too relaxed

Some seemed uninterested

Some looked depressed

Some were overly conscious

So what do we learn from it. In life, we all try to maintain a balance between our mental states and bodily actions. We get instructions from our brains to complete the tasks as effectively as possible. We all want to reach our goals without losing the balance! At every stage of life, we compare ourselves with people who are similar to us in some capacity. When we see others going fast, we try hard to win. Meanwhile, when we see others leaving behind, we try harder to get better than those who are ahead of us. And the race continues.

In fact, life is not a race. We don’t have to win to compete with others rather we have to win to reach our full potential. When we reach our full potential, it does not matter whether we won or not. So we should try our best and use each and every possible means to find our dreams. We should enjoy the process as well. The goal should not be to win and leave others behind; rather win while utilizing our full potential and improve ourselves to achieve what we want.

Consider the age appropriate reasoning in motivating your kids to do something important to you and them

The word ‘why’ is very important in motivating a person to make some decision. When one believes that the task given to him is worth considering, he/she is naturally inclined towards it. The goal, belief, purpose, benefit or cash whatever is in your mind to boost your energy towards a set task, is the most important thing. It is usually in your unconscious when you set your mind to take an action. There could be one or several motivating forces behind your actions;  however, usually one factor is big enough to make a person willing to do something.

For the children ‘why’ is very important as well. They are never willing to do anything unless you tell them the reason for that. Suppose being a parent you want your child to work hard and stand first in his/her class. You apply different techniques to get that goal. You offer various reasons to work hard. Say you tell them to:

  • Work hard – as it will help you to become a successful man in future
  • Work hard- as it will help you to gain popularity among kids.
  • Work hard- as it will boost your scores in the class.
  • Work hard – as your parents would feel proud of you.
  • Work hard – as you will get a beautiful life after that.
  • Work hard – as you will be punished if you fail.
  • Work hard- it will make you smart and strong.
  • Work hard- if you want to achieve your goals in future.
  • Work hard- it is good for your mental health.
  • Work hard- as it was the wish of your grandparents.
  • Work hard- as I love to see you working hard.

Consider all of these goals wisely and think about them. Do you feel motivated if you are said like that? Rarely, we get involved by these motivational catching statements. What about children- they don’t pay attention at all!

Now change your strategy and divide the time into the units. For the kids, consider the age of the child being a big factor in making them motivated towards doing something. If your child is 5-year-old and he/she is interested in playing with toys for most of the time; then consider this information as the best motivating force. For example:

  • Work hard for one more hour – as I have a secret surprise for you.
  • Work hard for the next two hours- as there is something of your choice waiting for you.
  • Work hard for half an hour please- as we are going to play together after that.
  • Work hard for one more hour please- then you will get a reward sticker for today.
  • Work hard for the whole day – as in the end of the day, you will be surprised by some sweets (of your choice).
  • Work hard for two hours only- then you can watch your favorite movie/video.

 Basically, there could be anything from your kid’s favorite world of choices to offer to motivate them. They will get motivated and willingly perform the hard work each day. After passing a few months or weeks, they will no longer be interested in the old motives; rather would need a new list of motives to make them energetic again. And the cycle of motivation will continue until they would understand the meaning of working hard in the real sense. And as each child is unique and capable of doing a lot with the great power of motivation, enthusiasm and creative abilities; one should seek for various incentives for each child to work in the unconscious according to her age group and as per her own need at that particular time frame.

Thanks

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