We being a human always search for easy fixes, short cuts, and quick ways to fulfill our desires, wishes, and needs. We want to be happy as early as possible. We are quite impatient and inconsistent in achieving our goals to become successful. It is our nature and we fight with our nature to look mature, reasonable, vigilant, cool, persistent and tolerant.
I see people spending a huge amount on only entertainment: crazy sports, watching movies, reading fiction, clubs, dinners, parties, celebrations, shopping, and what not. I see people spend a lot on the things they do not need rather they think they would need. I see people spend a lot on luxuries as compared to their needs (after their basic needs fulfilled).
Have you seen people drunk on the roads, especially on weekends? Have you seen people in clubs, dancing, drinking, and having fun in a large number? Have you seen people in cinemas watching their favorite movies? Have you seen people in the markets while buying lots of stuff luxuriously and carelessly? Have you seen people traveling for fun sake only? Of course, you must have seen people in libraries lost in books too.
What is the difference between the two types: the one searching for happiness outside and the one searching for happiness inside. The first choice would never end: after each episode, there is another to watch, after buying one thing, you would need another one tomorrow, one drink this weekend and one for the next one, one resort this year and another for the next year. So there is no full stop, no satisfaction forever. You have to be engaged daily while pursuing your pleasures and happiness.
The second way is looking inside. In this mode, you are going inside- looking for some help, researching your problems and their solutions, finding new concepts to deal with, creating new theories to tackle and jumping in the sea of happiness that would leave its footprints on your personality forever. You are growing day by day – giving more life to your senses, body and to the world outside.
Suppose you are marring a man/woman who is just perfect for you. You think his/her company would have a tremendous effect on you in the long run. You may go for it but risk is yours. You might not get what is in your mind – you might be wrong in assessing that personality. On the other side, if you think you are strong enough to decide and live by your choice and the other person is free to live with you as per his/her wish and till the time you both are having good terms. In this case, you are not bound to live together forever with someone you do not deserve, as your partner is not bound too to live with you. In this scenario, both of you are not at risk: neither in union nor in separation.
Through a little analysis of the above example, we come to know that in the first approach, one is handing over its worries and happiness to someone else’s hands. Whereas in the second approach one is not willing to live by its partners choice, thus is more inclined towards its inner strength and will power.
When you close your eyes and try to forget about your problems, problems remain there. When you take your problems as your projects and work on them with motivation and determination, the problems start to diminish. Similarly when you engage in time-consuming activities to forget your worries, you waste time. Though time is a good healer but it is not a good healer in each and every matter of life. Moreover, time healing techniques is not yours – it would play its role as per its nature. It might be the lifetime to heal your wounds! So would you waste your whole life for time is the only healer for you!
I do agree that time is a great healer but only for little problems. When you have got cold, you have no option except to take Paracetamol. Similarly in some tiny matters, you need to pass time and wait for the solution of your disease. What about chronic diseases? Should you wait and see what will happen tomorrow or should you go to the doctor to consult? Definitely, you should seek a doctor’s advice. So it depends on the situation. Like medical problems, if your problem is interfering with your day-to-day life, and it is more than a month and your problem is persisting; do not ignore the symptoms. Go to some specialist and get some advice. Do not waste your time. You cannot find happiness in drinking, shopping, traveling, playing, watching or doing something to let you forget about your worries. As there is no quick fix to your psychological disorders, to get you out of trouble miraculously. Yes, you can find happiness through these hobbies, if you are already happy. So first, become happy, then look happy, first deserve then desire, first feel then enjoy!