Perceptions and Aspirations

How can you improve your chances of being abused in an intimate relationship:

We all are victim of abuse in one way or the other in our life from someone at some particular point. Though we don’t fully understand the abusers in our society and could not recognize them at first glance; yet we could feel a little discomfort in their presence. We, in one way or the other, feel compelled to do something, guilt, being overly criticized, ignored or controlled or pressurized in our heart while confronting/obeying someone’s commands. This is known as abuse- more specifically emotional abuse. It is, in most cases, the abuser’s responsibility to have a check on his/her attitude and modify his/her behavior accordingly; yet it is also the abused one’s personal obligation towards his/her self to respond appropriately while being abused.

How can you trigger the abuse in your life – here are some examples that would suggest new angles to see the situation and make you alert in advance:

 The abuse would multiply if –

 You look too simple to deal with. When people think you are too good, too simple, and too polite; they will feel no threat in abusing you as much as they like.

  1. You ask with silly gestures and childish attitude- you are welcoming the unnecessary comments and the possible abuse from the black sheep.
  2. You are fulfilling the demands of the other person unnaturally; in this way you convey the message that you are the most obedient servant of him/her.
  3. You cannot say ‘no’ to someone who is crossing limits in dealing with you.
  4. You convey by your attitude that you never feel being degraded or humiliated or in other words, you welcome the abuse in your life.
  5. You keep silent on matters you should speak up or at least speak to someone to help you out.
  6. You remind others through your reactions that you have no self respect, self esteem and dignity to preserve so they can cross limits whenever they feel like.
  7. You never keep others in limits or you have no ethical limits to follow for yourself. You are not a man of principles.

 You ignore the abuse  in the first place, then it grows, and grows till the point, it is out of reach. So you should be very careful in dealing with an abusive relationship when it starts.

These are the simple guidelines to prevent abuse or abusive relationships in your life forever. When one is simply ignorant of the causes of the disease; he/she would never be able to carry out the precautions in advance. Thus, you are now aware of the disease ‘abuse’ and can put some checks on it in future. It will save you from many psychological and emotional disorders like depression, anxiety, guilt, hypertension, stress, sleeplessness, and ultimately suicidal and destructive tendencies. The most important is that you would be living an ‘abuse free’ life – a happy life.

Thanks

Improve Your Perception For A Smart Choice

We all live a busy life and find no time to make decisions with complete peace of mind. Always we are in a hurry to do something, to take some action/reaction and then regret while having no choice later on! When you go for shopping, you are fascinated by different things in shops and many times you go for a thing that look prettier to you at that particular moment. There are many things that you, do not like today with that intensity for which you have bought them a few years back. You are again in the vicious circle of looking for something new everyday and keeping your regrets alive each day!

Here is a simple tip for you to consider before going for a shopping:

a. When you are overwhelmed by a product to have an instant buy, stop for a moment. Think if it is 100/100 in your mind – means you are completely in love with it! If it is that much adorable, then it will carry only 70 points in your mind after a week or so.

b. If you think that a product (you want to buy by heart) carries 70 points out of 100 in your mind, then understand that it will only hold 50 points after a week or so.

c. If you think the product is equal to 30 by 100; then it is better to leave it as it will leave you with regret after your purchase.

Now think about emotional, intimate relationship decisions. In the same scenario, when you see someone with great features; you are passionately overwhelmed by the product (boy or girl). This is the time to analyze it with caution. You can carry out a little judgment instantly and look for its value in numbers.

a. If the person carries 100 by 100; think after 10 years of marriage, the number will be reduced to 70 or so.

b. If the person carries 70 by 100; after 10 years or so, he/she will reduce his charm by 30 percent and hold only 50 out of 100.

c. If the person is keeping 30 or so marks in your heart out of 100; then please do not go for it. Leave him/her alone.

In most of the matters, when you are in between and could not decide anything for you; it is always better to leave that particular thing for a safe decision making.

My numbers are not exact; variations are always there and depend on the persons particular needs and choices criteria. However, these numbers convey the caution that we all could apply in our day to day decision making struggles, from buying a glass of water to looking for a partner to live with forever!

Thanks

Things look beautiful in shops!  

Have you ever noticed things look more beautiful in shops than viewing them at home after having a purchase?

Have you ever found someone more attractive at a distance than sitting beside him/her and have a wee chat?

Have you ever thought about the girls you adore, would become little less attractive after getting married to you (or vice versa)?

Given the fact that things lose their attraction when we find them closer and closer day by day. By nature, we cannot focus on the same object for the whole of life. We keep on changing our priorities and shifting our attention as per our needs and requirements. This is very much aligned with our innate characteristics by birth. However, there could be some exceptions in this regard too.

Now, before going for a shopping, could you imagine you have already done it. If so, then what are your feelings? If you cannot imagine, what are your feelings after having a purchase? What are your feelings after spending some time with your favorite thing? What are your feelings after a month of purchasing your favorite thing? You must have forgotten what were your feelings when you purchased something you used to fancy. So this is a continuous loop of wishing, feeling happy, and then wishing again for something else.

What about having a date with someone you love the most? Do you feel a lack in your relationship after spending some time together? If yes, you are taking people like things with whom you will be used to. If yes, then you should be very careful in selecting them for a relationship, as you get bored easily, even with humans.

People are not, like things- they grow in terms of age, experiences, knowledge, attitudes, emotions, and the list is never ending. So we never get used to and look for another. However, it is worth considering that we need to improve our relationships for not being sick to each other. The more areas of mutual interest, we explore among our relationships, the better it is for us. Otherwise, things will start deteriorating and get stuck.

Nature has protected us from being stuck in a relationship through a cool process of parenting and upbringing the children. After becoming parents, couples share many things together – thus moving forward together while focusing on the same object (e.g. Children). With children, we grow together and never get bored!

Nowadays, marketers are exploiting our emotions very wisely in terms of upgrading the software, products and attractions. We purchase them and upgrade them- thus are less likely to get a feeling like stuck. Things keep on changing, and we are never completely used to them. Things that cannot be upgraded; usually lose their attraction very soon.

 To conclude, we need to upgrade things (traits) in us to survive in the market  through various strategies like:

  1. Learning new things/ fields
  2. Having new experiences
  3. Meeting new people
  4. Visiting new places
  5. Creating new horizons

When we stop doing upgrading, we are stuck. We are used to ourselves first and then with others. Therefore, to get a long, healthy life, it is very important to continue with the change outside and inside. It is something we all are doing unconsciously with the help of evolutionary laws; it is something we need to improve too through effort and hard work.

If You Are Perceived Wrongly- It Might Be Your Fault!

Let me introduce you some examples first to get to know the real subject later on.

‘ Stop! Stop! What is wrong with you’, said a caring parent.

‘Stop! Stop! What is wrong with you’, said a loving child to her parent.

What do you think about the both statements- are the same in nature? No. Certainly No. When a parent says ‘stop’, it is due to his caring nature being a parent; whereas when a child is saying the same thing, it might be due to imitation, ignorance, or might be due to some distress in mind. In any case, both expressions are not conveying the same meanings while having the same alphabetic language.

 ‘ Take care, and stay safe’, said a caring parent.

‘ Take care, and stay safe’, said a loving child to her parent.

It is again the same thing. The parent is caring and involved in safety issues with the child and the child is assuming as if she is a grown-up, so pretending to become a caring parent.

‘ Why are you not listening to me carefully?’, said a loving husband.

‘Why are you not listening to me carefully?’, said a loving wife.

 Here again husband is a bit aggressive and hyper in mood while arguing with his wife whereas wife is complaining against her husband’s indifferent and neglectful attitude.

‘ I am happy with your performance today’, said an employer to his employee.

‘ I am happy with your performance today’, said an employee to his employer.

 In this example, an employer is happy with his employee’s performance and employer is misbehaving with his boss in a rude manner.

 In the light of the above examples, one can easily conclude that language varies widely between relationships and would never convey the same meanings for each party involved. Even in friendships, partners speak relative to each others social and emotional status.

 Children being junior members of your family might exaggerate your angry feelings and would name it a kind of threat to their happiness and safety. They do need a different level of anger from that you use in your office at least!

 For couples, husbands are by default at the top position, so they must show over caring attitude and nice gestures for being more responsible and energetic as a man. For a wife might name a husband’s little angry mood a kind of emotional abuse, being more tender and subtle human by nature.

 Likewise, every relationship demands different language to speak with. We cannot rule over all people with the same hammer. When we go into the details of the healthy relationships, it is very important to understand that love speaks many languages and that too differs from person to person. We have to consider many other factors indeed in deciding about our way of communication: age, sex, culture, education level, background, personality type, I.Q, E.Q, physical health and the most important is the other person’s status in the relationship with you.

Conclusively, It means while speaking with someone junior to you (in age, position, or status) more respect than you usually give to others, is needed so that he/she should not feel degraded or humiliated due to your slip of the tongue only. It implies on your children, wives, and servants or anybody junior to you in general. Especially when you are in a bad mood, try to show less aggressive attitude as much as possible (lesser than what you usually show to your friends) so that the people who are dependent on you should not feel dejected or neglected due to your sudden rude behavior.

Thanks

Why Don’t We Always Do Good And Have Good In Return?

Have you ever noticed that your mother behaves differently from what you expect from her?

Have you ever felt that your father is not as encouraging as you expect him to be?

Have you ever thought that your partner is not behaving as nicely as he/she should?

Have you ever had a feeling that your children are not as much caring as you want them to be?

Have you ever observed the attitude of your partner being totally strange for you?

There are many moments in your life, when you simply could not clue for the opposite behavior of your friend or acquaintance. You remain speechless and surprised to know that your friend is totally different from what you are expecting from him/her.

Although there could be several reasons for others indifferent behavior to us; yet one of those reasons is our misjudgment and misperception of our relationship on both ends. Whether we are not according to our friend or our friend is not doing as per our wish; both are configuring the relationship puzzle in totally a wrong way.

Relationships are never equal in nature. Your father is your father and he will behave as a father due to his nature of the relationship whereas you are the son who being a son could not behave like a father! Being a daughter, you always remain a daughter and could never behave like your mother. Mother on the other hand remains mother and could never behave like a daughter. Same goes for every kind of relationship. We can become parents and friends with our children, but we cannot leave our parenthood to become friends only with our children.

Children expect the quality of love and care from parents; parent would never expect the same nature of love and care from their kids! For example, for kids, to ask for water and food is a gesture of their understanding, that they still are dependent on their parents, whereas their parents asking water or food will convey the message that they love to see their children being independent and caring. Parents show their affection through various ways of care, whereas children show their love through their childish demands and funny ways.

In couples, similarly, wives show their love through cooking, cleaning, and dressing up for their husbands, and husbands show their love through buying food, luxuries, and gifts for their wives. Thus the both partners hold different manners for their expression of love. So much so, both have different physical attraction points to convey the same message- love.

Therefore, to expect from someone the same nature, the same attitude, the same feelings as we hold for them or in return for our deeds, is a big mistake. We are never same in any of the worldly relationships; rather we are parallel and comparable in some of these. When we do something good for someone in our own specific way; we should not expect the same from him/her. He/she might behave differently on the same task; but could show his/her affection on some other task in his/her particular manner. Therefore, to expect the same thing from someone is never achieved in relationship studies. We are being compensated and rewarded differently in a different manner in return for our love, care and affection. Sometimes, we are not rewarded at all; due to the same reason in fact. This happens due to our multi dimensional brain and its capacity to be flexible and rigid in several areas of our choice and leaving others unattended and ignored consciously or unconsciously.

Unique Diversity Of Perceptions

Figure and ground relationship is very common among gestalt psychologists. It is one of the most popular laws of visual perception which states that figure-ground organization is a type of perceptual grouping that is a vital necessarily for recognizing objects through vision. It is known as identifying a figure from the background ( cited in wikipedia).

Without any background, vision is not complete. Even blank or white background plays its vital role in our perceptual understanding of the objects.

figure and ground image

see more on:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Figure%E2%80%93ground_(perception)

What do you think this picture is about:

  1. two girls’ faces.
  2. Two child’s faces
  3. A vase
  4. A marble building
  5. A sketch of faces
  6. A sketch of a tomb
  7. Two men’s faces
  8. A glass
  9. A door’s interior
  10. Reflection in the mirror
  11. Two friends’ faces
  12. Enemies faces
  13. Black children faces
  14. White children faces
  15. Indian faces
  16. Any thing else

These are only examples. You may create any meaning from the above picture. Your perception is yours and there is no guideline to perceive this picture in one particular way. You are the author of your own unique picture. Everybody in this world would create a different perception about this picture ; about other pictures ; and about every other scene of this world. There are countless perceptions of the same picture indeed; rather more precisely there are countless perceptions of the same concept in this world.

Similarly there are countless expressions of the same perceptual image. When we perceive some information, we interpret it in our brain and express in some ways. We, no doubt, do it automatically, unconsciously and systematically. Our actions, then, depict some portions of our perceptions. Thus, each one among us, carries a distinct and separate way of expressing its unique perception. No two expressions are similar to each other; though could share some of the features and manifest them fully. Just like our faces that can resemble to someone fully while sharing some of the traits too; but we are unique in our personality from many other aspects. Our perceptions are alike.

What a great amount of perceptions we hold! Incredible human perceptions and their related expressions make us truly a unique being in this world. Whether you are a lay man, a teacher, a business man, an artist, a skilled worker, a nurse, a gate keeper, a leader, an organizer, a manager, a student, a sweeper, a lecturer, a dentist, a doctor, or a scientist; you are unique in your perception. You do not need to collect references to support you or collect examples to validate your view point; you are already unique. Your attitude, emotion, interpretation and beliefs can never match or compete. Your ways are yours and you are responsible for them. Though you may blame someone for guiding you in a wrong direction; but the last decision was yours to take a step ahead. So it is you who perceived wrong. Step back and take charge of your perception. Honor your perception being unique and subtle; the world will honor you in return.

No Perception Is Universal!

The law of closure in which we tend to see the incomplete figures as a whole while ignoring gaps and missing spaces. This popular law of gestalt psychology, shape our over all perception indeed. We, not only perceive pictures as a whole, rather every thing as a whole. By nature we do not like to perceive gaps in our perceptions or we believe that our perception is perfect whatever it is. Therefore, in spite of looking at a disordered picture, we convince our self that the picture is complete, with no fault. To help you making a concrete picture of the law of closure, please have a look on this page:

 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gestalt_psychology

 Movies are good examples. When we watch a movie, we know a little about characters and their status; even then we believe in our perception and imagine the story is real. We try to fill all the gaps, errors, and loop holes while watching a movie silently. This is our nature and we cannot go beyond that. If the movie is a real pain in ass, we will try to collect all relevant information to convince ourselves that the movie is not worth watching. In either case, we will try our best to cover the missed information and believe in the fake story presented in the movie.

This law creates many emotional/relationship problems when we are shown a few traits of our friends or relatives and we perceive them as a whole. Suppose you see a person who always greets you and talks nicely on phone. You can quote a few other things with his reference and that’s all. Now as far as personality traits are concerned they are countless and perceived in thousand ways by different people in different timings. You only know a little about your friend if you ask any psychologist about it. However, you have made your perception and that is not going to change through any rational argument. This is your nature – perceive things as a whole.

By contrast, when we try to perceive things correctly, our own perception is considered faulty and distorted among our family members and friends. In this case, you may argue that your friend is nice when his mood is high or on the day his pay arrives in the bank; on other days, he is little rude and clumsy. You could even analyze more correctly and precisely but that means you are not very much with your friend. There are many chances that your friend would keep you away from his list of friends. So the truth is that people not only perceive the information as a whole (whether it is faulty, incomplete or fake) rather like them to be perceived as a whole in the eyes of others.

We hate criminals due to their crimes but we actually do not know how many good deeds they have also completed so far.  As we know a few crimes of a person, we make the picture of his whole personality instantly and believe on that till our last breath. When we hate someone for some reason, we cannot say we hate him for that reason only; otherwise we love him. Either we love someone or not, we hate someone or not; we cannot do both at the same time with full logic. All of our perceptual tendencies force us to believe in one reality and leave the other distracters, dissimilarities, and ambiguities.

This is true not only in relationships, rather we want to perceive the Higher Power ( the God) as the only one without any fault and limitation. In all over the world, in almost all the religions, people believe in such power and fill in the blanks themselves. Their perception about the god is complete, with no question mark and suspect. This is our true nature and we just cannot go against it. The people who find errors in their concept of believing in God, simply leave the idea. They do not believe in God. However, we cannot find people who claim that they believe in God in these matters and under specific circumstances and do not believe in Him in these cases. This is harsh but indispensable truth ; either we believe or not!

 What is this discussion all about? It is to convey you that you cannot perceive the whole person in your whole life exactly in the way you need to perceive. You will only join the  dots ( those you are exposed to)  and make a picture in your mind according to your rules of perception. When your perception is so faulty, how can you trust on it? When you cannot trust on your perception; how can you say that that person is going to be a loving partner in your future life? Crazy thought! Is not it? You are badly trapped and your mind is still not convinced on the logic I have just given. That is why it is said that what we see is usually what we want to see. There is no formula to check other person’s behavior crystal clear and that is a blessing in disguise!

What do you think if we are able to see things in parts ( not as a whole) with respect to their attributes, limitations, and faults? Should we , then, able to love anything/anyone around us so purely and genuinely?

What We Perceive In Happy Mood?

We all have different kinds of aspirations, perceptions and beliefs. There are many theories about how we form them, modify and re-establish them for our purposes. Among several theories one is that we make them instantly, indirectly, and unconsciously while experiencing a unique situation or event.  This kind of concept usually becomes the base for other future concepts that would be added into it step by step from time to time. Now consider the following concrete examples for clarity purposes:

  1.   Suppose you are happy and in uplifted mood. On the way back to your home, you see a grand parent coming across your way. You smile for a while and he replies with warmth and a nice gesture. You are again on your way to home.
  2. Suppose you are happy and in great unusual spirit due to some reason. Meanwhile, your friends invite you to join to watch a movie in cinema. You go with them and watch the movie (otherwise a boring stuff for you). You come back with the same mood indeed.
  3. Suppose you are incredibly happy and in a pleasant mood. You go for a walk and do little shopping. You enter a shop and the sales person smiles at you with warmth and welcoming gestures. You roam about and come back.

In the first example, the person who came across an old man in the happiest mood ever, would never be able to forget that man in his life. Whenever he would meet someone resembling like him, he would feel a strange kind feelings and love for him. He might have forgotten the reason for that!

In the second example, the person who watched a boring movie in a real great mood, would never be able to forget that movie.  He is more likely to remember all details with good impressions than criticizing and forgetting. Those impressions are now part of that person and he is less likely to believe in the real cause of liking that movie!

In the third example, the person who meets another person while feeling great pleasant emotions would never be able to dislike that specific person. Rather he would go to that shop repeatedly unconsciously. He would love the sales persons of that shop and environment of that shop overall while ignoring the real cause of his liking.

In all of the above examples, things that convey no meanings in it self become specific and significant due to our unconscious emotional life pace. We are likely to behave better in a better mood, and we usually receive all good in return that become part of our personality eventually. So the circle of happy feelings continue to flourish and grow.

With our happy moods, negative experiences are also likely to depress and dim in degree. We usually do not pay much attention to negative people, negative circumstances or negative environment in our happiest ever moments. In rare times, negative events spoil all our happy taste, but that means that negative event has much more potential to destroy our mood than happy ones.

There Is No Objective Reality Indeed!

“Belief is defined in Webster’s Unabridged Third New International Dictionary as a ‘conviction of the truth of some statement or the reality of some being or phenomenon………………………… One must therefore take cognitive, behavioral, sensory, motivational, affective, and contextual factors into account when attempting to unravel the mysteries of belief system evolution.” (Walters, 2002, p. 21).

 We perceive as per our interpretation and understanding of the world. We are not always right in assessing people around us- rather, many times we have to face challenges, dishonesties, and cruelties of other people. We could not get the reality due to disguised faces, fake facial expressions and postures. We have to believe on our senses- eyes and ears especially. We have no other way except to believe what we are encountering with. There is no objective reality in this world – as all realities are subject to our own experiences with the environment in which we interact directly. We are for most of the time product of our own beliefs, concepts, and theories for that we solely are responsible. That is why so far, nobody could prove scientifically that he/she is right in his/her conduct.

Not only our perception of the relationship is biased, our perception with  the universe is too absurd. Some among us like all what is blessed to them, including miseries and misfortunes; some say thanks to only a few of them and complain for troubles and sufferings; and some say thanks for the misfortunes and complain for the blessings. The first two categories are well understood as we all belong to one of them. What about third one? Many of us belong to the third one, but they rarely are aware of that. For example: when a parent thinks that a baby boy is a symbol of abundance and prosperity, they say thanks to the Universe for such a blessing.  Later on, that boy brings complaints for them. Similarly a girl is usually thought as a sign of bad luck in many parts of India. When that girl brings good luck to the family, the family reconsiders their views and says thanks for her instead of saying complaint. The same is true with many things for which we should say thanks – we complain against; the things we should not complain and say thanks instead, we complain.

Being a parent, you must have observed your children’s behavior minutely. Have you ever noticed that your children are not following in the same directions you are teaching? Yes. It is true. Children follow the guidelines, but with their own interpretations. You will say not to run, and she will stop walking; you will ask her not to throw things and she will conclude that you do not like her; you will tell her to finish the plate and she will throw the food in the dust bin! Thus, since childhood we are quite prone to misinterpret or interpret in our own way to suit our goals and objectives.

Colors in all over the world are same- red is red, black is black and white is white. If I tell you to imagine red in your mind, which image you imagine – blood, follower, flag, eyes, shirt or what. The same is true for all colors. We all keep various images for various colors likewise for various concepts. We distinguish strongly in our imagination of the same concept given to us in the unique manner. We believe in the same concept while expressing differently. For example: being straight means honest to one’s feelings or being arrogant, would depend on the perceiver’s unique perception of the concept. Being romantic means being sexy (physically), intimate (with empathetic attitude) , or loving ( simply nice in communication) ; would also depend upon the perceiver’s special ability to perceive such a complex emotional trait.

Gender discrimination is very common in many parts of the world. It is worst in the countries where people derive their own meanings of well defined world rules and laws. Such persons commit crimes against women of different kinds, but use different concepts to convince and protect their survival overall. It is well noted that “Common errors of construction include arbitrary inference, dichotomous reasoning, magnification, minimization, overgeneralization, and personalization, although other possibilities exist.” (Walters, 2002, p. 45). Thus, the most wanted criminal acts can also be justified, appreciated and valued subjectively.

However, what do you think about subjective reality? Do you still feel that your opinions are based on unbiased truths, beliefs and values? Are you still convinced that your reality of life is universal and your values are appreciated internationally in the way you express them? Do you still hold a belief that your expression is the best expression indeed? If yes, you are still in the process of learning self perceptual mechanism. If No, you have already mastered the skill I am teaching myself yet.

Ref:

Glenn D.walters. (2002). Criminal Belief Systems. An integrated-Interactive Theory of Lifestyles.

Save Your Time And Look For Everlasting Relationships

When you go for shopping, you come across many products of your choice and you choose something that you like obviously in terms of beauty, quality, and price. When you have no choice available, you go to the item you are in need of. When there are some choices, you do a little comparison of price, brand and quality. You pick one that fits in your criteria. The point I want to raise here is that some of us go for the quality irrespective of high price; some go for the design of the product and ignore the other features; some go for the price and ignore other traits ; and we all adopt different criteria for different products in different timings. Our ultimate decision is very much satisfactory or we regret that and promise for the future awareness. We learn from our bad shopping habits and try to improve our list by adopting different strategies with respect to our knowledge of various brands and their relative quality traits.

However, in human relationships, there is less time left to amend our decisions. When we take a wrong decision in relationship, we have to suffer for longer and the after facts are everlasting in many cases. Whether you are young and in a relationship or in the process of establishing a good relationship; your little decisions in the matter contribute a lot in your future level of overall happiness and satisfaction. Once you start experiencing wrong things, your energy, enthusiasm and potential start deteriorating day by day and in the end many would collapse. That unfortunately is unacceptable and worse outcome to achieve in life.

Suppose you are a product and you want others to like you for what you are- how would you convince others to do that? Simply by showing your personality traits, attitudes, habits and emotions. But what if they like your face, body, and height! These are good pretty awesome traits of your personality, but very much deceiving and critical in terms of relationship. When someone would start living with your outer self; you might be in trouble after some time. As the other person’s relationship with you is not based on sharing something together rather attracting a body for a while. Thus, there are chances that you will go for a break up very soon! This is true to you as well, if you are going for the outer beauty of the other person. Here from outer beauty I mean anything that you could see from your naked eyes: body, job, wealth, health, successes, social life, status quo or anything alike.

On the opposite side, when you go for the inner beauty, for some specific attitude, for some unique emotional quality of a person; there are ample chances to win the game. As you are going for the long lasting traits of the product; you might not get bored and look for anything else very soon. There might be something else that you do not like or that surprise you in someone when you start living with that; but the situation would not be as intense as that in the first case could go.

Therefore, if you want your partner to look inside you for a long time; you are advised to see inside others too. When you would select a humble and honest inside  as well as show your inner clear and empathetic – your partner would appreciate it. When you show outer side and look for outer beauty; you attract the same quality in your partner and in the end, both smash bluntly to break-up or to live together forcefully.