Improve Your Perception For A Smart Choice

We all live a busy life and find no time to make decisions with complete peace of mind. Always we are in a hurry to do something, to take some action/reaction and then regret while having no choice later on! When you go for shopping, you are fascinated by different things in shops and many times you go for a thing that look prettier to you at that particular moment. There are many things that you, do not like today with that intensity for which you have bought them a few years back. You are again in the vicious circle of looking for something new everyday and keeping your regrets alive each day!

Here is a simple tip for you to consider before going for a shopping:

a. When you are overwhelmed by a product to have an instant buy, stop for a moment. Think if it is 100/100 in your mind – means you are completely in love with it! If it is that much adorable, then it will carry only 70 points in your mind after a week or so.

b. If you think that a product (you want to buy by heart) carries 70 points out of 100 in your mind, then understand that it will only hold 50 points after a week or so.

c. If you think the product is equal to 30 by 100; then it is better to leave it as it will leave you with regret after your purchase.

Now think about emotional, intimate relationship decisions. In the same scenario, when you see someone with great features; you are passionately overwhelmed by the product (boy or girl). This is the time to analyze it with caution. You can carry out a little judgment instantly and look for its value in numbers.

a. If the person carries 100 by 100; think after 10 years of marriage, the number will be reduced to 70 or so.

b. If the person carries 70 by 100; after 10 years or so, he/she will reduce his charm by 30 percent and hold only 50 out of 100.

c. If the person is keeping 30 or so marks in your heart out of 100; then please do not go for it. Leave him/her alone.

In most of the matters, when you are in between and could not decide anything for you; it is always better to leave that particular thing for a safe decision making.

My numbers are not exact; variations are always there and depend on the persons particular needs and choices criteria. However, these numbers convey the caution that we all could apply in our day to day decision making struggles, from buying a glass of water to looking for a partner to live with forever!

Thanks

ABUSE IN DISGUISE

According to wikipedia, “Psychological abuse, also referred to as emotional abuse or mentalabuse, is a form of abuse characterized by a person subjecting or exposing another to behavior that may result in psychological trauma, including anxiety, chronic depression, or post-traumatic stress disorder” and Any act, including confinement, isolation, verbal assault, humiliation, intimidation, infantilization, or any other treatment which may diminish the sense of identity, dignity, and self-worth (for more info see http://www.vchreact.ca/read_psychological.htm)

Emotional and Psychological abuse includes:

  •      Telling someone they are worthless,
  • Telling them no one else wants them,
  • Forcing someone to do things at an exact time or in an exact way,
  • Undermining a persons actions, thought and beliefs,
  • Telling someone they are weak and could not manage to look after themselves on their own,
  • Making someone believe they are mad,
  • Telling someone that the domestic violence and abuse is their fault.
  • Not allowing someone to have visitors,
  • Controlling who a person is friends with,
  • Not allowing them to go out,
  • Not allowing someone to see their family and friends,
  • Not allowing someone to be left alone with other people,
  • Not allowing someone to use the phone, send letters or emails.
  • Locking someone in a room or house,
  • Not allowing someone to go out to work, not allowing someone to go to college or evening classes,
  • Accompanying someone everywhere that they go in order to keep control over what they do, who they see and what they say.
  • Telling someone they are a bad parent,
  • Getting children to say and do things to upset someone,
  • Encouraging children to get involved in the abuse.
  • Abusing someone’s children or pets,
  • Damaging possessions,
  • Accusing someone of lying when they are not,
  • Telling someone they are fat, ugly and useless,
  • Making someone believe that no one else likes them.
  • Threatening to harm someone, or to harm their children or pets.
  • Threatening to have someone locked up saying that they are mad,
  • Threatening to have someone deported or withholding care if someone is aged, ill or disabled,
  • Telling someone they will find and kill them if they leave,
  • Threatening to abuse someone in front of their children, family or friends.

Emotional abuse is often difficult to recognise. It can be very subtle, often being overlooked by a person’s friends and family. The person affected may not even think or feel that abuse is taking place.

Emotional abuse can affect women and children experiencing it in many ways. It can leave deep psychological scars and can seriously damage the self-confidence of the person experiencing the abuse. For more information see:

http://www.welshwomensaid.org.uk

In most of the cultures of this world, abuse is simply not even recognized as abuse, rather considered a moral and spiritual duty of the women towards their husbands. Usually husbands and in-laws use all kinds of abuses towards their daughter-in-laws. In most of the emotional and psychological abuses, women are exposed to, women are simply not aware of the fact that they are being abused on daily basis. one can easily recognize the forms of subtle and traumatic abuses from such examples:

  1. women are restricted towards visitors, visiting family and friends, and going out in general.
  1. women are required to perform a set of duties at a particular time, in a specific way, and according to someone’s special needs whether they like it or not.
  1. women are under estimated in their capability to earn, to stay alone, and to manage the finances alone. In all important matters of life, they are not listened even!
  1. women are expected  to follow the customs and rituals of society blindly, irrespective of the fact that many of them create severe depression, anxiety and stress in turn. For example: traditions designed to feel women less empowered like rukhsati, karo kari, and others.
  1. women are also expected to live according to their husbands sweet wishes. It would include any thing from having more than 12 children in less than 12 years, to being childless in 20 years of married life! It includes everything from having full cocktail hijab to bikini style beach dress! All depend upon a man- the husband.
  1. women are taken as sex objects in some of the culures – so they are no more free to move freely.
  1. Women are never given identity of their own name: at first they are identified with the name of their father and then after marriage they are recognized on behalf of their husbands good names!

In most of the areas of Pakistan, women are treated as if they are not human at all. Their identity, respect and worth are of no value when they are being brought up. So much so, they are not well protected, fed, and secured in their own parents’ kingdom. As a result, they become victims of trauma, anxiety, depression, stress, and many other psychological and emotional disorders. Well, they are not aware of this fact that they are being abused and it is a crime in the dictionary of Law. It is a blessing in disguise as if they knew it, their stress would be doubled!

Things look beautiful in shops!  

Have you ever noticed things look more beautiful in shops than viewing them at home after having a purchase?

Have you ever found someone more attractive at a distance than sitting beside him/her and have a wee chat?

Have you ever thought about the girls you adore, would become little less attractive after getting married to you (or vice versa)?

Given the fact that things lose their attraction when we find them closer and closer day by day. By nature, we cannot focus on the same object for the whole of life. We keep on changing our priorities and shifting our attention as per our needs and requirements. This is very much aligned with our innate characteristics by birth. However, there could be some exceptions in this regard too.

Now, before going for a shopping, could you imagine you have already done it. If so, then what are your feelings? If you cannot imagine, what are your feelings after having a purchase? What are your feelings after spending some time with your favorite thing? What are your feelings after a month of purchasing your favorite thing? You must have forgotten what were your feelings when you purchased something you used to fancy. So this is a continuous loop of wishing, feeling happy, and then wishing again for something else.

What about having a date with someone you love the most? Do you feel a lack in your relationship after spending some time together? If yes, you are taking people like things with whom you will be used to. If yes, then you should be very careful in selecting them for a relationship, as you get bored easily, even with humans.

People are not, like things- they grow in terms of age, experiences, knowledge, attitudes, emotions, and the list is never ending. So we never get used to and look for another. However, it is worth considering that we need to improve our relationships for not being sick to each other. The more areas of mutual interest, we explore among our relationships, the better it is for us. Otherwise, things will start deteriorating and get stuck.

Nature has protected us from being stuck in a relationship through a cool process of parenting and upbringing the children. After becoming parents, couples share many things together – thus moving forward together while focusing on the same object (e.g. Children). With children, we grow together and never get bored!

Nowadays, marketers are exploiting our emotions very wisely in terms of upgrading the software, products and attractions. We purchase them and upgrade them- thus are less likely to get a feeling like stuck. Things keep on changing, and we are never completely used to them. Things that cannot be upgraded; usually lose their attraction very soon.

 To conclude, we need to upgrade things (traits) in us to survive in the market  through various strategies like:

  1. Learning new things/ fields
  2. Having new experiences
  3. Meeting new people
  4. Visiting new places
  5. Creating new horizons

When we stop doing upgrading, we are stuck. We are used to ourselves first and then with others. Therefore, to get a long, healthy life, it is very important to continue with the change outside and inside. It is something we all are doing unconsciously with the help of evolutionary laws; it is something we need to improve too through effort and hard work.

Why Don’t We Always Do Good And Have Good In Return?

Have you ever noticed that your mother behaves differently from what you expect from her?

Have you ever felt that your father is not as encouraging as you expect him to be?

Have you ever thought that your partner is not behaving as nicely as he/she should?

Have you ever had a feeling that your children are not as much caring as you want them to be?

Have you ever observed the attitude of your partner being totally strange for you?

There are many moments in your life, when you simply could not clue for the opposite behavior of your friend or acquaintance. You remain speechless and surprised to know that your friend is totally different from what you are expecting from him/her.

Although there could be several reasons for others indifferent behavior to us; yet one of those reasons is our misjudgment and misperception of our relationship on both ends. Whether we are not according to our friend or our friend is not doing as per our wish; both are configuring the relationship puzzle in totally a wrong way.

Relationships are never equal in nature. Your father is your father and he will behave as a father due to his nature of the relationship whereas you are the son who being a son could not behave like a father! Being a daughter, you always remain a daughter and could never behave like your mother. Mother on the other hand remains mother and could never behave like a daughter. Same goes for every kind of relationship. We can become parents and friends with our children, but we cannot leave our parenthood to become friends only with our children.

Children expect the quality of love and care from parents; parent would never expect the same nature of love and care from their kids! For example, for kids, to ask for water and food is a gesture of their understanding, that they still are dependent on their parents, whereas their parents asking water or food will convey the message that they love to see their children being independent and caring. Parents show their affection through various ways of care, whereas children show their love through their childish demands and funny ways.

In couples, similarly, wives show their love through cooking, cleaning, and dressing up for their husbands, and husbands show their love through buying food, luxuries, and gifts for their wives. Thus the both partners hold different manners for their expression of love. So much so, both have different physical attraction points to convey the same message- love.

Therefore, to expect from someone the same nature, the same attitude, the same feelings as we hold for them or in return for our deeds, is a big mistake. We are never same in any of the worldly relationships; rather we are parallel and comparable in some of these. When we do something good for someone in our own specific way; we should not expect the same from him/her. He/she might behave differently on the same task; but could show his/her affection on some other task in his/her particular manner. Therefore, to expect the same thing from someone is never achieved in relationship studies. We are being compensated and rewarded differently in a different manner in return for our love, care and affection. Sometimes, we are not rewarded at all; due to the same reason in fact. This happens due to our multi dimensional brain and its capacity to be flexible and rigid in several areas of our choice and leaving others unattended and ignored consciously or unconsciously.

Rukhsati: A Tragedy Of The Women Of Pakistan

rukhsati

source : retrieved from Google images. Just search ‘rukhsati’ on google, or on you tube; you will get it all what it means to Parents of Pakistan.

Parents who are symbol of love, care, blessing and happiness for the children are sometimes perceived as strangers, caretakers, and home owners. Parents who should give unconditional love to their children, in some parts of the world, extend their love to their children if they belong to a specific gender-male. For girls, their love is temporary, conditional and very much hypocritical. In almost each and every part of Pakistan:

  1. Daughters are taken as guests in the parent’s home until they are married.
  2. Girls are supposed to leave their parental home forever on wedding day (a tradition called Rukhsati)
  3. Sons are expected to live with their parents and take care of them.
  4. Daughters are expected not to visit their parents often after marriage
  5. Son is usually discouraged to see his in-laws often
  6. Daughters are supposed to do house chores and obey their husbands /in-laws
  7. Most parents think it is a matter of their great honor ( in the most negative way) or they will kill their daughters if:
    • Their daughter gets a divorce and come back due to any reason
    • Their daughter is raped or abused
    • Their daughter comes back due to facing brutality and cruelty of in-laws
    • Their daughter comes back due to having husbands rude, unfair and constantly demanding attitude
    • Their daughter is simply not ready to get married
    • Their daughter is having an affair  or on date
    • their daughter wants to live independently and alone
    • their daughter wants to live with her parents forever

In short, parents that are the only hope of children in this cruel world to welcome them, comfort them and console them in time of need and grief; in Pakistan girls are very much deprived of that ever lasting shadow of pure and powerful loving background. Girls, to some extent, receive their share of love and care from almost all kinds of parents; however that love is not enough to provide them with the energy to fight for their rights and live happily ever after. In life love is not the solution of every practical problem; rather we need to enforce some laws, rules, regulations to administer the social evils wisely. The traditions that cause discrimination, feelings of helplessness and flourish injustice, abuse and cruelty/atrocity among society members at a large scale, must be banned. We are not born to follow traditions blindly; rather traditions are established to comfort and facilitate us in a better way. Hope,  people and especially parents would think twice before saying their girls a guest in their homes.

Save Your Time And Look For Everlasting Relationships

When you go for shopping, you come across many products of your choice and you choose something that you like obviously in terms of beauty, quality, and price. When you have no choice available, you go to the item you are in need of. When there are some choices, you do a little comparison of price, brand and quality. You pick one that fits in your criteria. The point I want to raise here is that some of us go for the quality irrespective of high price; some go for the design of the product and ignore the other features; some go for the price and ignore other traits ; and we all adopt different criteria for different products in different timings. Our ultimate decision is very much satisfactory or we regret that and promise for the future awareness. We learn from our bad shopping habits and try to improve our list by adopting different strategies with respect to our knowledge of various brands and their relative quality traits.

However, in human relationships, there is less time left to amend our decisions. When we take a wrong decision in relationship, we have to suffer for longer and the after facts are everlasting in many cases. Whether you are young and in a relationship or in the process of establishing a good relationship; your little decisions in the matter contribute a lot in your future level of overall happiness and satisfaction. Once you start experiencing wrong things, your energy, enthusiasm and potential start deteriorating day by day and in the end many would collapse. That unfortunately is unacceptable and worse outcome to achieve in life.

Suppose you are a product and you want others to like you for what you are- how would you convince others to do that? Simply by showing your personality traits, attitudes, habits and emotions. But what if they like your face, body, and height! These are good pretty awesome traits of your personality, but very much deceiving and critical in terms of relationship. When someone would start living with your outer self; you might be in trouble after some time. As the other person’s relationship with you is not based on sharing something together rather attracting a body for a while. Thus, there are chances that you will go for a break up very soon! This is true to you as well, if you are going for the outer beauty of the other person. Here from outer beauty I mean anything that you could see from your naked eyes: body, job, wealth, health, successes, social life, status quo or anything alike.

On the opposite side, when you go for the inner beauty, for some specific attitude, for some unique emotional quality of a person; there are ample chances to win the game. As you are going for the long lasting traits of the product; you might not get bored and look for anything else very soon. There might be something else that you do not like or that surprise you in someone when you start living with that; but the situation would not be as intense as that in the first case could go.

Therefore, if you want your partner to look inside you for a long time; you are advised to see inside others too. When you would select a humble and honest inside  as well as show your inner clear and empathetic – your partner would appreciate it. When you show outer side and look for outer beauty; you attract the same quality in your partner and in the end, both smash bluntly to break-up or to live together forcefully.

When You Perceive A Negative Belief In The Name Of Positivity

Positivity is a universal trait and a common factor to enhance our well being all over the world. Every day we learn about positivity and try to adopt it as much as possible in our day to day life. We love to be called as positive parents, couples, children and positive members of our society. We by all means, fight with our negativity and try our best to achieve an acceptable level of  resilience. It is our utmost aim to live a happy, positive and successful life.

Unfortunately, our positivity is not a real positive thing  rather a cultural belief. In some of the cultures of this world, people are suffering from their positive (unnatural and false) attitudes.  For example, in the traditional societies of Pakistan, there are many beliefs that are thought as positive and people love to hold them as a symbol of pride and honour whereas they are a source of grief, anxiety, and depression for the other group of people.

Consider the following examples for clarification purpose:

In Pakistan:

  • It is very common to wish a baby boy for a young couple as boys are thought as superior than girls.
  • Baby girls are thought as guests in their own home. It is very much acceptable belief that a girl’s own home is settled after her marriage.
  • They are usually given less priority in almost all affairs compared to boys. It is very common norm to say exclusively to girls to eat after the boys and serve the others.
  • Some household chores like doing dishes, cleaning pots, washing, and dusting, are reserved for girls due to their very nature (low-degree jobs).
  • Many things like riding a bike, playing in a park, running a shop, riding a bike and dressing up like boys, are thought as boys things so the girls are not allowed to do that.
  • Most of the families do not allow girls to select their partner and they consider it a matter of their honor.
  • On the birth of a baby girl, mothers could be divorced, beaten, or verbally emotionally severely abused.
  • Some professions are taken as reserved for girls only (teaching, medical, and artistic) otherwise boys can join any profession they like to be in.
  • A girl has to obey her husband throughout her life (irrespective of his cruelty, tortures and abuses), as divorce is thought as a stigma on a girl’s life.

People do not accept the right of living alone for their girls as it is  too a matter of honor and dignity.

The list is never ending indeed. My purpose is not to highlighting the discrimination against women in Pakistan, rather to emphasize the idea that some of the cultural things are taken as a symbol of pride, honor and respect; people adopt them and feel happy in adopting them blindly as a part of their culture. They have no idea that their acceptance of cruelty would make the counter parts sick, dumb and vulnerable, susceptible, and unfortunate.

In the light of the above examples, girls feel extremely low self-esteem, decreased level of self-worth, lowest level of self-respect, and lose their self confidence in studies, social life, and after that in professional life. They feel homesick in the company of their own parents, they feel rejected and ignored at home and in society, they feel less powerful in the practical life ahead and in the end they compromise for the sake of their own family – usually children.

What is so positive in the eyes of the public (it is better for girls to stay at home) is not a fair decision. What is  so acceptable among society members (girls are guests in their own homes) is making our half of the population feel homeless and homesick. What is taken as a symbol of honor (you are the mother of boys) is making the daughters feel miserable and less worthy. What is  thought as girls’  sole responsibility (to perform exclusively household duties) is an example of severe gender discrimination.  What is  so common and good tradition of our culture (girls leave their parents on wedding day and live at the mercy of their husband and in laws forever) is making our daughters feel segregated and helpless in many ways. Indeed, these are all rubbish ideas, wrong theories, and false practices established in the dark ages when people lived in caves and had no education at all.

My stance is that one must not accept all the positivity blindly until or unless it is proved that the idea is worth accepting as a positive idea. One culture might involve something negative in the name of positivity. It is not always enough to say that hundreds of thousands of people are following one thing so the thing is worth following. NO. Sometimes, a wrong thing is followed by a large group of people, but the thing is wrong indeed. Thus, it is up to you whether you accept the idea as a positive one or reject it as it is. When a positive idea is positive, it spreads positivity. On the other side, when a negative idea is supported by most people and thought as a positive one- it will generate negativity, discrimination, inequality and resentment. There is no such universal formula that could define what is negativity and what is positivity – but you can save yourself from such messages through a severe negation as they stop you from being active, confident, successful, energetic, passionate, vibrant, creative, professional, empowered, assertive, decisive, happy and lively.

Thanks

When rules and values need not to be put through?

SAM_2489

We need rules, values, laws and boundaries create a peaceful society, to control our emotions and to have a little check on all of us for being honest, trustworthy, and disciplined human being. We, in all over the world observe certain patterns with respect to our safety, integrity and well-being. We as a nation cannot deny the rule of law over almost everything we come across, whether it relates to your ego, respect, and freedom of choice or it is a matter of your rights of living, schooling, and facilitating your health worries. We, with no doubt, understand the importance of civic laws, social laws, and moral laws, especially which are running in our local setups.

Now consider the following examples :

I still remember when I entered UK immigration zone three years back. It was in the long queue waiting for the check out while holding my one year old infant baby boy on my lab. Though my son was intact and seemed fresh, yet I was over tired with the long journey of about 15 hours,  while doing babysitting and nursing intensely. I was thinking that UK is a country where rules have priority over everything so I would have to face a long queue in any circumstance. Moreover neither me nor my son was sick to get some excuse. While I was thinking in these lines, one lady came towards me and took me to the front bench to sit and wait. I thought there must be some kind of punishment for me as I was from Pakistan( apparently a corrupt country ). But then I came to know that it was an honor for a mother with an infant to get priority over public  and leave the queue. We were out of the immigration so soon that no one could imagine.  This was not discrimination rather a great gesture of honor for the mothers from the UK ( the country of laws).

Usually we are bound to obey the road signs and traffic rules in Scotland. Police can put a penalty of huge amount if someone is caught by while breaking the law. However, I with my little son have enjoyed a free walk and crossing at any time, at any place without any obvious restriction of law as traffic from both sides willingly and courteously used to stop for us even in rush hours and at restricted places (where one cannot cross the road). It does not mean, we are illiterate or getting unfair advantage of our rude behavior rather wherever we stand for a while along the road, the traffic from the opposite side thinks that we are about to cross and stops. Sometimes, we had to cross the road unwillingly as the traffic was waiting for us to clear the road. How amazing and caring attitude indeed these people have!

My driving instructor told me about each and every rule of driving while saying that when there is matter of saving your or others life, no rule is more important.

In buses, trains, and parks, people give priority to others (older, younger, kids, women, special) voluntarily and leave the space for them.

Once I took my parcel back from the Royal Mail, which has already been sent to the receiver. According to law, no one could do me a favor but according to morals, one could get it back. I thought it is UK, so law would not help me out. I was wrong in that assessment as the people here left the law aside to get me out of trouble. I thank royal mail for their timely help and great concerns.

Therefore, laws are there to help us , to organize and control us, to create discipline among nations, societies, and cultures, to protect humans from animals or animal like humans, to punish the cruel acts and to flourish the empathy and sympathy among people, to save the nation from discrimination, nepotism, and inequality, to promote love, cooperation and justice  overall. But whenever there is a special need to break the law in rare circumstances, to get the same objective (described above), one must not care for the law and rather go for the objective. It is too one form of abiding by, strengthening and rejuvenating the law in real spirit. So when the law is the basic hurdle in cultivation of peace, break it or bypass it for your safety and dignity.

Fashion Culture In Pakistan

Fashion is not bad rather a need in today’s modern lifestyle. It is not limited to only dress out-fits rather covers all aspects of life from home-décor, gardening, cultural things, vehicles, traditions, parties, vacations, hobbies, professions, to beliefs,values, thoughts, priorities and identities. In almost every culture of the world, we can see it flourishing to some extent whether it is related to new trends in dresses, haircuts or tends in buying luxury cars, villas, or resorts. Unfortunately, in Pakistan, it has become a need!

Now the question is:Is fashion a need, a source of self-esteem, a status symbol, a sense of well-being or a source of low self-esteem, an unfailing desire, a cause of poverty, a feeling of lack? What is fashion in a country where more than 80 percent of the population cannot afford food, electricity, shelter, clothing, peace, education, and health?

Our country has not been developing for many years. We are facing many challenges: Taliban crisis, security crisis, poverty crisis and safety crisis. We have unemployment, crowded roads, filthy water, and no gas at all in many parts of the Pakistan. Still, we need fashion for our survival!
Recently, I have seen many places in our country and met many people in general from bottom line to the cream.People, especially, women are spending their most of the time in planning to wear fashionable outfits, striving to look like models in the fashion industry; they are interested in changing hair color; they care for their interior décor; they care for their bags and nails! Usually fashion takes priority when it comes to spend something after buy essential food items.

Fashion is not bad if you want to do it for some purpose. But if you have no healthy food at home, you have no money left for your health needs, for your educational needs, for your shelter needs, you are making a big mistake by adopting a fashionable lifestyle and promoting it at the same time.
Being a nation, as a whole, we need to think about it. We are not having enough resources to fulfill our basic needs (food, shelter, safety), and until our level best, are striving for looking good in the eyes of others.

Here are some guidelines to improve the economy of our country through a change in the attitudes of people:

1. Usually people serve their guests with as many dishes as possible. One must not serve more than one dish to the guests, whether they belong to close family, high status family or distant family.

2. In Pakistan, people simply do not like to re-wear the same item in the family function due to social and cultural pressures and honor’s sake. One should wear the same out-fit repeatedly to attend parties, functions, marriages, etc. Until it is worn out.

3. One should not spend a lot in using electrical equipments like A.C., Generators, or U.P.S., as none of these will be helping our country to get rid of electricity crisis.

4. One should not use any penny on anything non-essential whether it is an upgraded mobile phone or it is a new pair of shoes with jewels embedded on it.

5. Why wear a lot? It neither is in the favor of the economy nor is perfect according to religion. As per our religion, one must not exceed limits in any matter of life, whether it is a matter of money or matter of clothing. One should only spend on clothes according to his/her budget and specific need in the most respectful way- nothing more.

6. Every woman needs to work whether at home or out of home, whether paid or unpaid, whether for the sake of family or to the sake of self. No one should remain unemployed unless otherwise stated (due to some specific health reasons).

7. Luxury in food must be controlled whether it is related to domestic cooking or food marketing. In domestic cooking, simple and easy food should be encouraged, promoted and liked in general. Food marketing strategies must be refreshed and regularized such as advertisements of unhealthy products, offers of unhealthy food in restaurants, and promotions to invite people in some status symbol restaurants.

8. The security of one person should not be considered as the individual’s only responsibility. One must complain for other’s mistakes to the relevant authority for the matters like offending someone, harassing someone, looting, cheating or stealing etc.Similarly, one must notice dirty and filthy places and complaint about it to the concerned authority.

In the country where the laws and the structure of the economy is deteriorating day by day, people are usually encouraged to change their lifestyle from fashion to simplicity, from status to necessity, and from luxury to needs oriented attitude.Until the time, law-enforcing agencies take action and notice, people must do something to resolve their problems themselves. After all, we are suffering from the poor economy and its consequences for long. We should not be allowed to wait and see anymore!

Lastly, your opinion on the said topic would be much appreciated. Thanks

 

To The Mothers Of The Aggressive Children

 

Being a Muslim and a good human being we always give respect and favor to our mothers for their love, belongingness, care and sacrifice. Mothers are no doubt embracing the medal of nourishment and development of their kids. They are fully responsible for their kids moral and ethical education. Especially in the society of Pakistan, mothers’ role cannot be ignored as they have only one obligation to raise children and to do house chores (they are not forced to work outside).

With extreme apology, I must say that where mothers are appreciated for their brave, intelligent, successful children, they must be blamed for their cruel, hyperactive and aggressive off springs. When we say, mothers lap is the first place to learn, we must not forget the people who commit crimes, kill other innocent citizens and rape their sisters. Why not their mothers take charge of their deeds? Why not their mothers are liable for their sick personalities and ill behavioral aspects?

It is very important to understand what I want to say in this regard. No doubt, mothers are always loving, caring and nurturing by nature. No doubt mother must be respected everywhere. No doubt, mothers cannot stop crime and cruelty among society members. We cannot deny the mother’s  contribution to her children, whether she is educated or not. But at the same time, we cannot ignore mothers too when we talk about suicide bombers, honor killers, rapists, and terrorists.

Should we not educate mothers to teach their children about love, humanity, friendship, caring, sympathy, helping, generosity and gratitude. Should we not take measures to educate mothers before educating criminals, killers and suicide bomb blasters. Should not we deal with the root cause intelligently and wisely? Should not we take the mothers’ role seriously in eradicating the insecurity from the society? Should not we call mothers help to decide about our future’s peace and harmony in the most realistic manner? Only in this way, in my opinion the root cause of the unrest can be tackled with success.

Mothers can play a big role in maintaining a peace in the region. Mothers can stop the war of terrorism forever. Only mothers can perform such a duty in this critical time and help all of us miraculously. Only mothers can take the charge of bringing a change in society through their unconditional love towards their children and a firm attitude towards the negation of terrorist activities. Only mothers need to be awakened and get their children back on track!